Pros and Cons of Social Media & Kids
If you are trying to figure out how much and what type of social media access your kid should have, we are here to help.
Navigating social media today can be challenging, especially for children and adolescents. There are clear benefits gained from social media – engagement with peers, learning about other cultures, and more.
However, the research has shown that the use of social media can also pose certain risks. One potential adverse effect is an increase in anxiety and depression. As you know, the brains of children and adolescents are not fully developed, which means some abilities (such as logic and emotion regulation) aren’t ready for the online world.
Suppose someone replies to a post with a negative comment. In that case, adults are able (or perhaps usually able) to use rational thinking to decide whether or not to give credence to this person’s opinion. Children, on the other hand, maybe at an elevated risk of feeling hurt or accurately critiqued in some way. Whether commenting or liking and disliking posts, the messages kids receive through social media can impact how they think about themselves and others. For example, if your child’s post received all positive comments and ten likes, they may still become upset because a peer’s post received more than ten likes.
Social media also tends to create anxiety around missing out. Teens may see their peers posting pictures of activities that they weren’t invited to and experience anxiety or sadness over being left out. Indeed, your child cannot possibly participate in every activity, but before social media, the activities of others weren’t necessarily front and center for all to see.
What Can Parents Do to Reduce the Risk of Harm from Social Media?
While we wouldn’t want to deprive kids of one of the most common ways of engaging with their peers, there are ways to reduce risk by setting specific expectations. Here are some tips to get you started.
#1 – Reduce Screen Time by Increasing Time Spent Elsewhere
A word of caution: Restricting access to a highly rewarding stimulus increases the dopamine rush of obtaining said stimulus. In some cases, parents may unintentionally induce addictive tendencies (e.g., sneaking screen time, lying about screen use, choosing games or shows over their basic needs, etc.).
Instead of reducing access, consider filling your child’s schedule with other activities and then allowing access to screens, assuming all other responsibilities are met. If your child does their homework and chores, spends time outside and being active, engages with family members, and anything else that might be important for their wellbeing, then how they use their free time matters a bit less.
It’s common for parents to fear their child will stay up all night on TikTok or playing video games after doing all their other responsibilities. While that might happen sometimes, your child will quickly learn that it’s unwise to do so when you have to wake up early for school or other responsibilities.
#2 – Establish Screen-Free Zones
Another guideline to consider is which areas of your home are screen-free zones. Areas your family may consider are the kitchen, dining room table, and bedrooms. Along with screen-free zones, your family can designate screen-free times. Times you may want to designate as screen-free may be:
- One hour before bed
- Meal times
- Family time
- While in the car, except for long trips
- While at school
- While doing homework
- While walking
- When friends are visiting
- Scheduled technology breaks
Just like children are taught manners for in-person social interactions, they need to be taught manners for social media. Your family should include guidelines like no devices at the table, not looking at or using a device while talking to someone, and not posting negative comments on social media.
Some families also set boundaries around where devices are charged overnight. Two possible locations for charging are in the kitchen or the parent’s bedroom. This boundary can help ensure your child is not losing sleep due to interacting with their device overnight.
#3 – Have a System of Approval for Online Access
An important consideration for your family’s media plan is guidance on what media is acceptable for your child. Some examples of this guideline could be:
- Asking for permission before visiting new websites or video sites
- Asking for permission before downloading apps, movies, and games
- Asking an adult if the apps, movies, or games are appropriate for their age
- Only playing video games that align with the family’s rules, both at home & at someone else’s house
- Playing learning apps
- Only using video chat with permission to communicate with friends or relatives.
Parents can also use resources like CommonSenseMedia.org to learn more about content and media they are unfamiliar with. If your child tells you they have viewed content you define as inappropriate, discuss it with them. This discussion can include why the content is inappropriate for someone their age while letting them know it is safe to talk to you when they see anything that makes them uncomfortable.
#4 – Teach Your Kids About Online Best Practices
Safe use of social media and the internet is another important component of a family media plan. Guidelines that some families have found helpful include:
- Tell a parent or another trusted adult if you or someone else is being bullied, disrespected, attacked, or mistreated online
- Not being rude or bullying anyone online
- Tell a parent or another trusted adult if you get messages or photos that make you uncomfortable
- Do not share pictures online
- Do not give out personal information online
- Do not accept friend or follow requests from anyone you do not personally know (including friends of friends)
#5 – Be a Role Model
Kids are always watching and learning from those around them.
Children observe how adults use their devices and interact with social media. This fact makes it important for adults to model safe and healthy social and other media use.
One way to do this is to limit your screen time and abide by your family’s screen-free times and zones. Appropriate content can be defined by creating appropriate apps, games, and ad-free streaming for children. Parents can locate learning-based videos and games and encourage children to use those first. You can also teach your children how to identify ads within games and websites and how to avoid interacting with these ads. Parents can discuss the persuasive and sometimes biased opinions used in advertising with older children.
Social media can have positive and potential adverse effects for users of all ages. Creating a Family Media Plan can help reduce these risks with clear guidelines and expectations.
